I Used to Think..

I used to think

… that you were the best person to have by my side.

… that no one could make me laugh like you could.

… that no one else would be so unconditionally there for me like you.

… that your arms were the only ones I would ever need.

… that your scent would be my only source of comfort.

… that I didn’t deserve your love.

I now think

… that I was wrong.

… that you gave up when things got hard.

… that I had been lying to myself.

… that I stayed that long because I didn’t want to fail at something, again.

… I should have listened to everyone from the very beginning.

… enough is enough.

… it is time to finally be happy, without you.

 

I now know

… that you were not the best person to have by my side.

… that many people make me laugh like you did.

… that almost everyone I now surround myself with, are unconditionally there for me.

… that I never needed your arms.

… that your scent is now unidentifiable, it’s not even a memory.

… that I will never need someone else to be happy.

… that I have finally learned from my past mistakes.

… that I am not who I used to be.

… why I went through everything I have.

I went through it all to find myself, to find the person who does deserve my love and who I deserve to love right back.

I now know that I do not hold grudges; I won’t waste my energy on you.  Instead, I will thank you.  Thank you for making me think and for making me wake up.

-JLA

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