Marriage, divorce, being single & relationships

As I mentioned in another post, the film Enough Said made me start thinking quite a lot about relationships.  The concept of the story was quite interesting to me.  If we knew everything about the person we would marry, from the very beginning of the relationship, their quirks and their faults- would you still stay with the person?  Even with all of the fights and the bickering, is it worth staying with that person?  Is that not what all relationships are?  It’s about finding the person that is worth going through the bad times with.  Although, “Hello divorce”! There is a reason why the divorce rate is so high and it’s because, like Eva said, people just don’t pay attention.  I’ve learned to listen to my gut.  You are feeling these things for a reason and if you ignore them then you’re lying to yourself and the person you’re with.  Yes, take chances and do what you want but don’t put your happiness in jeopardy if you already have those gut feelings.  I honestly need to start taking my own advice.  Sure, I have learned to listen to my gut but I am also a very stubborn person so I understand how this may be difficult for some.

All I know is, if I ever get married, that would be it.  Divorce is not an option for me especially if I have children.  I would not want to put them through that experience.  I do not mean to say that I don’t understand why people who do have children still get divorced.  People get divorced to make the situation better for their children and no one goes into a marriage knowing and expecting that it will eventually end.  I understand that you never know what will happen and believe me; I have been with people, who after ten years of knowing them become complete strangers because of how different they become.  That is the thought that scares me.  How does someone you think was your best friend for ten years turn out to be a completely different person in the blink of an eye?

I do not want past experiences to prevent me from living and taking chances but it does change the trust factor in relationships in general.  As you may have read in my other post, I have recently gone through a break up and I am currently single.  I don’t mean for recent life changes to cause myself to have a biased opinion on any of this.  I am trying to keep an open mind to relationships and if I find a person that I think is worth going through all of the possible struggles with, then that’s great and I will feel lucky.

However, I am also at the point where I almost want to give up on all of that and just come to terms with the fact that I am meant to be single.  Relationships have made me happy, don’t get me wrong but being single makes me feel like there are no limitations and I can do anything and everything without someone setting rules about what I can or cannot do.  The thing with that is, I just haven’t met the right person who thinks it’s worth going through the quirks I bring to the table… and that’s just fine.

I am still learning about who I am and what GOOD things I can bring to a relationship, I am learning about and dealing with my faults and it feels great.  As long as I am constantly evolving, I am open to any new experience and life lessons.  Who would have thought I would get all of this from a simple movie about divorced, single parents taking another shot at love?


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